Am I being gaslighted?
Gaslighting is a psychologically controlling technique that undermines someone’s perception of reality. When a person is gaslighting you, you will second-guess yourself, such as your memories of recent events. You may be encouraged to think you are actually to blame for something or that you’re just being too sensitive.
Do you ever have the experience described above? Ever felt small and unworthy in front of someone? Or perhaps, you’re doubting that you might be gaslighting someone to a certain extent? Then, come and take this 16-question test to evaluate your situation in an intimate relationship.
Friendly Reminder: Please think of a specific person in your mind and answer the questions accordingly. If you’ve got more than one person to analyze, you need to do it all over again to get another result.
- Does this person tend to exaggerate stories that you know are untrue?YesNo
- Do you find this person telling lies in front of you with an innocent look, even if just once?YesNo
- Do you ever find it hard to trust this person?YesNo
- Do you feel insecure and want to escape from this person sometimes?YesNo
- Did you do something that you wouldn’t have done if you weren’t manipulated by them?YesNo
- When this person looks angry, will you apologize immediately to calm them down?Yes, sometimes giving in will bring me more control on the conversation.No, I usually lose control and get mad as well.It depends, but I won’t keep silent. That makes me feel bad.
- Do you find that you’re always the one to apologize and make amends?Yes, at least I always apologize first.No, I never apologize first.Hard to say.
- Does this person ever imply that you’re not good enough to deserve everything you’ve got?YesNo
- With this person around, you tend to second guess your ability to remember details of past events?YesNo
- Do you feel hopeless and misunderstood?Yes, all the time.Sometimes I do.No, never.
- Are you afraid of speaking up and expressing your emotions recently?YesNo
- Were you ever pissed off by this person and then yelled at them?Yes, and I think it’s more frequent now.One or two times.Never.
- When you are out of temper, does this person act so innocent and indifferent, like you have a problem with emotional management?Yes, exactly!No, it seems not.
- Does this person spread negative stories or ideas about you to others?Yes, they manipulate the people around us to think badly of me.No, they would never do that.
- Do you find yourself telling lies so that this person doesn’t get upset with you?Yes, sometimes lying is the only way to keep them content.No, I have never done that.
- Have their acts of manipulation escalated over time?Yes, it started with small things, but now it has become more and more intense.No, that’s not the case.